Definitions. dating couple = (young) man and (young) women who have a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship between them.
Question. Should dating couple which regularly (or just without any good reason) put themselves in a situation where they are alone (and therefore exposed to the occasion of sin, for example, girlfriend visiting a boyfriend in his home when there is no one else with them) be granted absolution in the confession if they do not have a will to stop avoiding such situations?
Why it seems that they should be able to receive absolution.
- The couple may say (if they already fell into the sin once): "We are sorry for our sin against the 6th commandment of God, however, that situation was not the cause of our sin, but our evil desires were. Therefore there is no need to avoid the situation but we will just fix our desires. Therefore, since that situation was not essential to our sin, why should we suffer not receiving absolution for it, if we are contrite for that which was essential to our sin, namely, for our evil desires?"
- The couple may say: Why should we avoid such situations, when that situation can bring us some good which otherwise we would not be able to achieve, for example, we can study together and easier come to the knowledge of some subject?
- In today's practice, the Church does not deny absolution.
Why it seems that they should not be able to receive absolution.
Saint Alphonsus Liguori says (in Praxis confessarii t.64-65):
Adunt aliqui doctores negandam quoque absolutionem illi qui occasionem externam non removet, si cum occasione coniungitur habitus vitiosus, aut magna tentatio, seu vehemens passio, quamvis usque tunc in ea occasione nunquam peccaverit; nam facile deinde peccare poterit, si ab occasione se non amoverit... Et hic caveant confessarii a permittendo sponsis domos sponsarum adire et puellis earumque parentibus sponsos in domum admittere, quia raro aut evenit quod tales sponsi non labantur, saltem in verba aut cogitationes turpes in huiusmodi occasione, dum omnes aspectus et colloquia inter sponsos sunt incentiva ad peccandum: estque moraliter impossibile ipsos invicem conversari et non sentire stimulos ad eos turpes actos... Generaliter autem loquendo de adolescentibus et puellis qui invicem se adamant, quippe non sunt isti omnes indistincte de gravi culpa damnandi, sed ordinarie puto ipsos difficulter esse extra occasionem proximam lethaliter peccandi. Id nimium experientia patet: nam ex centum adolescentibus vix duo aut tres in occasione a mortalibus invenientur immunes; et si non in principio, saltem in progressu, tales enim adamantes prius conversantur invicem ob propensionem, deinde propensio fit passio postquam radicem in corde fixerit, mentem obtenebrat et eos in mille rimina ruere facit. Hinc cardinalis Picus de Mirandula, episcopus albanensis, in sua dioecesi per edictum suos admonuit confessores, ne tales adamantes absolverent su postquam ter ab aliis iam fuerint admoniti ab huiusmodi amore sectando non abstinuissent...
What follow is not a translation, but an attempt of a translation (it is now even wholly done from the Latin, so if there is an obvious mistake, please feel free to suggest correct translation):
Some Church Doctors add that absolution should be denied to one who does not remove the external occasion of sin if with the occasion there exists vicious habit or great temptation or furious passion, even if the sin was not committed in a such a situation. One would easily be able to sin if he does not move from such an occasion... And here let the confessors take care that they do not allow finances into house of fiancee; and to girls and their parents that they do not allow finances into their house, because it rarely happens that the fiancés do not fall into sin in such occasion, at least in words or in shameful thoughts; because every look and conversation between fiancés is a boost to sin, and morally it is impossible that two of them are spending time (hang out) together and that they do not feel impelled to those shameful acts... Generally speaking about boys and girls who are in love, not all of them without difference is for condemnation for mortal sin, but I think that they can hardly be outside of occasion to sin. That is manifest by experience; namely, out of a hundred young boys and girls, bearly two or three in that situation remain untouched by mortal sin. Even if not in the beginning, but as time passes, such lovers will spend time together because of sympathy, then sympathy will grow into a passion, and when it takes root in the heart, darkens the mind, and lead them to fall through thousands of cracks. For these reasons, cardinal Pico della Mirandola, bishop of Albanians, in his diocese made an edict with which he encouraged his confessors, that such lovers should not be given absolution, if they, after being three times warned by others, do not move from following such love...