The scripture is vague about what a widow or widower sexual life should be, please enlighten me.

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    The Christianity.SE is not a place to seek spiritual advice.
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    Commented May 31, 2014 at 15:21
  • Hi and welcome to our community. To clarify a common misconception about this site, we're a fairly academic question and answer site run by a secular company. We have numerous members who are Christians, but because of the nature of this site, we don't answer "advice" or "opinion" questions. It's not that we don't want to help, but on the contrary, we don't feel that it's in anyone's best interest to try to do so on this site. For more info, please see this post: Pastoral Advice Questions Commented May 31, 2014 at 15:53
  • @DavidStratton This has been phrased with the scope protestant - surely it's not unreasonable to ask what is Protestant doctrine on this topic? Commented May 31, 2014 at 16:44
  • @bruisedreed - It might be tagged "protestant" but the question is about "should". Asking what something "should be" is different from asking what a specific doctrine is on a topic. However, this question might be salvageable if it can be rephrased in a non-opinion-seeking way. For anyone interested in editing try to salvage this question, for tips see Tips for editing a question to make it suitable for re-opening Commented May 31, 2014 at 18:00
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    @DavidStratton thanks for the clarification - I've still got a lot to learn! Am I wrong to think that a relatively minor edit could make this an acceptable question? Also is this question: christianity.stackexchange.com/questions/28612/… acceptable or does it too require editing to fit the scope of the site? Commented May 31, 2014 at 18:39

1 Answer 1


The scriptures consistently portray marriage as the only valid vehicle of sexual expression:

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. - Hebrews 13:4 ESV

(Also cf 1 Corinthians 6:9-20)

Although the scriptures are not explicit wtih regard to masturbation, many Protestant denominations would view it as inconsistent with teaching against lust (cf Matthew 5:27-30 - note particularly, the reference to the right hand in that context), but they are generally less dogmatic about that than say using prostitutes which is explicitly condemned (1 Corinthians 6:15-16).

Practical advice to widows and widowers is much the same as for singles:

Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. - 1 Corinthians 7:1-2 ESV

So if you can live chastely as a single do so (explicit encouaragement for this option is given if you have the 'gift' for it, but discouraged if you don't: 1 Corinthians 7:7-9), but if you have inclination and opportunity to re-marry, you are entirely free to do that instead.

also, and more specifically for young widows:

So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander. - 1 Timothy 5:14 ESV

Although the wider context of verses 3-16 shows several issues at play regarding this advice.

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