The general consensus from the commentaries I've seen on this, as well as the teachings of my Church, taking all of Matthew 22 in context is that the invitation for salvation is open to all, yet few actually choose to come to salvation.
How this fits in with irresistible grace, or pre-destination is not clear to me. Our denomination does not believe in irresistible grace. (We hold some Calvinist views, but not all). It's possible that the reason I'm only finding commentaries that support the idea of resistible grace is because my sources are biased, but the commentaries I've found seem to be united on this verse, with the possible exception of the Barnes' Notes on the Bible. (Second commentary quoted below).
Clarke's Commentary on the Bible (Emphasis mine)
Many are called, etc. - This verse is wanting in one of Colbert's
MSS., marked 33 in Griesbach. See the note on Matthew 20:16. Many are
called by the preaching of the Gospel into the outward communion of
the Church of Christ; but few, comparatively, are chosen to dwell with
God in glory, because they do not come to the master of the feast for
a marriage garment - for that holiness without which none can see the
Lord. This is an allusion to the Roman custom of raising their
militia; all were mustered, but only those were chosen to serve, who
were found proper. See the note on Matthew 20:16. Reader! examine thy
soul, and make sure work for eternity!
Barnes' Notes on the Bible
Many are called, but few are chosen - Our Saviour often uses this
expression. It was probably proverbial. The Jews had been called, but
few of them had been chosen to life. The great mass of the nation was
wicked, and they showed by their lives that they were not chosen to
salvation. The Gentiles also were invited to be saved, Isaiah 45:22.
Nation after nation has been called; but few, few have yet showed that
they were real Christians, the elect of God. It is also true that many
who are in the church may prove to be without the wedding garment, and
show at last that they were not the chosen of God. This remark in the
14th verse is the inference from the "whole parable," and not of the
part about the man without the wedding garment. It does not mean,
therefore, that the great mass in the church are simply called and not
chosen, or are hypocrites; but the great mass in "the human family,"
in the time of Christ, who had been "called," had rejected the mercy
of God.
Matthew Henry's Concise Commentary
22:1-14 The provision made for perishing souls in the gospel, is
represented by a royal feast made by a king, with eastern liberality,
on the marriage of his son. Our merciful God has not only provided
food, but a royal feast, for the perishing souls of his rebellious
creatures. There is enough and to spare, of every thing that can add
to our present comfort and everlasting happiness, in the salvation of
his Son Jesus Christ. The guests first invited were the Jews. When the
prophets of the Old Testament prevailed not, nor John the Baptist, nor
Christ himself, who told them the kingdom of God was at hand, the
apostles and ministers of the gospel were sent, after Christ's
resurrection, to tell them it was come, and to persuade them to accept
the offer. The reason why sinners come not to Christ and salvation by
him, is, not because they cannot, but because they will not.
[snip]
The FourFold Gospel
For many are called, but few chosen. Many guests are invited, but few
are accepted; because some neglect and despise the invitation,
andothers cast dishonor upon the one who invites, by the self-willed
andirreverent way in which they accept his invitation. In this parable
thefirst parties invited represent the Jews; the city of murderers
isJerusalem; the persons called from the highways are the Gentiles;
theentrance of the king is the coming of the Lord to final judgment;
andthe man without the wedding-garment is anyone who will be found in
thechurch without a suitable character. The character of Christ is
ourwedding-garment, and all the regenerated must wear it ( John 3:5
Ephesians 4:24 ; Galatians 3:27 ; Colossians 3:10 ; Revelation 19:8
Revelation 19:9 ).
